LifeLint: Finding My Sleep Schedule

I'm a bit disappointed in the blog piece I posted yesterday. I was loopy with exhaustion as a result of biking, working a full day, and doing chores (milking, picking arms out of threshers, etc.). I had no downtime. So I basically shot out a summary of my day and laced it with silliness to cover up for my lack of content. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but I think it was too generalized and inauthentic. I simply didn't have the energy to say anything meaningful. Washington Irving's corpse unsubscribed to my blog and sent me a stern reprimand. But, hey! I'm finding my voice! So fuck that impatient corpse! He took all his material from German fairy tales, anyhow. He had it easy. I write from the heart. The ventricles, specifically.

BUT the flip side to my lackluster post is that it got me thinking about exhaustion and time management. I'm fascinated by people who can get their shit done and not look as though someone hollowed out their eyes with a ballpoint pen. I want to be those people. All of them. Pieced together like a fleshy Voltron.

Voltron: Not fleshy enough.

Thusly beginith forthrightly my first post in a series entitled: LifeLint: Putting Time Your Pocket so it Stays Out of Your Hair. Zing! Take that, hats!

Meh.

I'll just call it LifeLint... Finding My Sleep Schedule.

The first step to Finding My Sleep Schedule is to figure out how much sleep I really need. -- not how much I want. Too much and I've got the oversleep hangover. That's no good. Too little and I'm a stumbling mass of rage. That's even less more gooder. I've been operating under the assumption that everyone needs at least 8 hours. But that's bullshit. Proper sleep is a case-by-case basis that should be tailored to one's personal disposition. I think 8 hours is too much for me. It doesn't feel right. It feels like too much. I'm going to tinker around with 6 to 7 hours and gauge my energy levels using a robot I've embedded into my nervous system. Let's see how... I dunno, 12am to 6:30 works out.

(Now I know what you're going to ask. "Chris, is this another ploy to get me to watch you sleep?" Well, that's a fair question, little man. Yes. Yes it is. But it is not my primary objective. I don't want to sleep so much. This will leave less time for you to have to watch me sleep, so why not climb on board with my idea?)

If this goes well, I should be able to eke out a little extra waking time and increase my energy to focus on conscious endeavors. This will be hard because I love to sleep. Especially with you, sexy. But it's messing up my factory. I need a strong, German, fairy tale factory filled with words I can't understand. 6 to 7 hours a night.

Fuck you, Washington Irving's corpse.

SLEEP!